Putting It About A Bit

Earlier this week I printed out my manuscript of my children's book, planted a kiss on the coversheet (don't worry, not a lipsticky one) and sent it on its merry way to The Agent Who is Interested and Wants to See More.

Fly, fly, fly, my pretty one!

Call it denial or pessimism or preoccupation with various other mad and crazy things that are going on in my life, but I have a feeling that this will come to nought. I'm normally generally optimistic, but I just have a nagging doubt that this will turn out to be THE ONE. Can't be more specific - and it's certainly nothing to do with the agent involved - it's just something in my gut that is telling me not to get my hopes up. So with that in mind, I'm going to submit to another couple of agents. Everyone knows/will know that they're not the only ones looking at my book, so hopefully no one will be too put out.

Got to give myself a fighting chance, gotta spread the love!

Rejection 3

Just so I don't get too big for my boots...! The postman brought me another response from the original batch of agents I had targeted for my children's book.

Quite funny actually, as this one arrived hot on the heels of the email from The Glorious Agent Who is Interested and Wanted to See More. The fact that someone out there thinks I'm worth a second look really did take the edge off this new rejection!

So, it was a form letter. In fact, it wasn't even a letter, it was a slip! And they sent my manuscript back too, in spite of the fact I'd asked them to recycle it. I have to say it was pristine. I don't believe for a moment that it has been read, or if so, then only the first page.

None of this bothers me. The reason? I was at a writers' conference a couple of weeks ago and spoke to some people in the know who told me that this particular agent has very recently left their agency (I got the impression it wasn't amicable) and will be setting up a new agency in the New Year. The people I spoke to told me not to submit yet. Ah. Already had submitted. Oops.

So, I'd already written that one off in my head, with a view to finding the agent's new contact details and re-submitting to them in 2008. Which to be honest, I probably still will! I honestly don't think that they've seen my ms...and if I'm wrong, well, no doubt I'll get another slip!

Third Time Lucky...

I haven't blogged or written anything for a while as I've been working crazy hours, seven days a week for the last couple of weeks. I'm sooo tired. The finger is better though - thanks for your concern about it!

I'll post more detail later, but in the meantime, a bit of news...

...an agent wants to read my kids' book!!

I got an email yesterday. She'd read my first 3 chapters and synopsis and wants me to send the rest! Yay!

Am thrilled. Knackered, but thrilled. Even if it comes to nought I'm hugely encouraged. Third time lucky indeed.

Hurty Finger

I was oiling my step machine (oh yes) and I cut my favourite finger open. It's the one I use for pointing at things and pressing buttons and the like. I think I'll live - presuming I don't get lockjaw - but typing is ridiculously slow. And I keep pressing the wrong keys so that all my sentences tend ti cime iut akk weurd and mussoeketm kuje this and U can;t reakky maje vjur sencse/1

So you'll excuse me if I don't:

1 Get the hell on with finishing my novel
2 Do Nanowrimo-oh-oh-no-no
3 Blog
4 Point at things and press buttons
5 Go on my sodding, viscious, squeaky step machine

I gieuss thjst means U;kk have fat thighs and a gyutky conscuenec anboth nit siudng anight writugj/1!

A time-waster that writers can feel better about!

A good cause and good fun:

Click Here to check your word power.

I'm currently on level 40 and am shocked at how bad my vocab is! Apparently over 48 is extremely rare...let me know how you do!

EDIT: Ok, now I'm on 46! Only 2 levels off Stephen Fry-type genius!

Ask and ye shall receive....Rejection 2

In yesterday's post I merrily wrote that perhaps I'd hear from an agent this morning...guess what arrived in the post?

Rejection no.2. I had to smile.

As soon as I saw my own writing on the envelope, I just knew. I've always thought that if an agent is interested in seeing the rest of my ms they are going to very probably email (or even phone) me, not write. So anything coming through the post is likely to be bad news. I have heard of exceptions to this, but as a general rule I think it's probably true.

So what was this one like? Another personal letter, which is good. The agent basically said that although she liked my chapters she needed to feel absolutely in love with something to want to take it on. Totally fair enough. She also said something along the lines of 'I'm sure you'll be successful anyway,' which was probably one of those throwaway lines of consolation. If not, it does kind of beg the question: why didn't she want to take me on?!! But no, I get it. I don't feel bad about it either, remarkably. If I take her at her word, she liked it but not enough. I want my agent to fall in love with my work, I need them to be as excited by it as I am. It makes total sense.

I'm feeling weirdly confident about my writing at the moment. I don't mean this to sound big-headed, but I feel quietly sure that I will get somewhere eventually. With the confidence comes a realisation of just how far I've still got to go, but I do feel I can do it. My children's book is in great shape - I wouldn't have sent it out if I felt it wasn't - but I appreciate that I'm only a beginner at this and I've got a lot to learn. I think my chick lit novel has got some fab elements to it, but some parts truly, truly SUCK. It's going to take a lot of work and heartache before I start sending that out to anyone!

This is a great journey. I'm impatient as hell and I have times of seriously questioning my ability, but on the whole it all feels exactly what I should be doing. I'm in this for the long haul and Rejection no.2 is not going to change that. Neither will no.22 or no.42 - I'll just keep plugging away!

(Remind me of that occasionally, ok? If I get up to Rejection no.102 I might need to reassess...!)

Ok Universe, I asked for a response from another agent and I got it! Now can I have a positive response please?

No news is...no news.

On Thursday it'll be a month since I sent out my first 3 chapters of my kids' book to a (very) select group of my dream agents. Within 9 days I'd heard from the first one, which made me believe that in spite of everything I'd heard to the contrary the rest would be close behind. But here I am - oooh, DAYS later - still no more word about my words.

I know that a month in this business is a nanosecond. I might have said that already in this blog, once or twice. I know that while many agents say they try their best to respond within a month to six weeks, it must be incredibly difficult to get through all that slush. And I also know that in the US it's even slower, so I should count my blessings I'm in the UK.

But I still wanna know! Mwa!

How long do you leave it before you gently prod? I'm thinking maybe 2 months...but then it will be nearly Christmas and the agents will be all frazzled and rushed off their feet and stressed about buying presents and hung over and depressed at the prospect of spending the holiday season with annoying relatives and have colds and be short staffed and tired and have wet feet and parties to go to and be annoyed at how the rest of the world seems to grind to a halt at this time of year even though they're still trying to get through their work load so they can bunk off too and not feel too guilty about it, goddammit!

...ie, If I leave it too late, they might not be in the mood for reading my offering. How dare they be human.

Then again, I might hear something tomorrow.

Continuity

I've been reading a lot of Chick Lit recently. When I first started my novel it was important not to read other's stuff, as I was frightened I'd be influenced by their voices. Not now; I've found my groove and I'm sticking to it. I find that what I read now only benefits my own work; if it's well written it inspires me and reminds me to aim high and keep striving to be better, if it's bad it makes me check to see if I'm making the same mistakes.

I've read some really, really well written Chick Lit, quite a lot of 'ok' books, and a couple of very badly written ones that I've struggled to get through.

This doesn't shock me. It's partly to do with taste, admittedly. However what does surprise me is that I've read quite a few that are extremely badly edited! How can this happen?

For example, in the last 6 months I have read 2 books where a character's name has changed. No, I'm not kidding. MID SCENE, on one occasion. In the first book, there was a minor character - let's say she was the main character's aunt - who appeared briefly in one notable scene early on in the book. Then towards the end of the book she is mentioned again, except called something different! In the second book, in one of the last chapters of the book the main character has a bit of a showdown with her boyfriend in the bedroom. Her boyfriend's name changes halfway through the bloody scene!! With both these instances, I read back through the book to see if I'd missed something. I'm thinking, 'Who the hell is Aunt Ruby?' or 'How come this bloke John just turned up in bed with the two main characters?'. I swear to you, the names were wrong.

I've also noticed the following inconsistencies in several books: hair/eye colour change, people wearing the wrong clothes for the season, geographical inaccuracies (like driving from London to Leeds via Somerset, that kind of thing). There are many more things I've tutted at and then forgotten.

And then there's the stylistic and technical stuff; UNINTENTIONAL things like repetition or sudden point of view changes. Even, in one book, a spelling mistake!

I know how this makes me sound. Believe me, I am all for artistic licence and I'm open to giving the writer benefit of the doubt in cases where I think it's been some kind of style choice. But what I want to know, is how can this happen?

Granted, I know enough about writing to understand that with the best will in the world you can read and edit and check your ms a thousand times and still not see that you've made a few mistakes. But in most cases, your ms then gets read by your agent, who hopefully will pick up on some of them. Then it gets passed to your editor. She might decide that she thinks that Aunt Ruby should be Aunt Rose, or John should be Jake. So you change it. Then presumably, she reads it again. Quite a few times. Then it goes to a copy editor. I've heard that these people really go to town and quite often suggest a lot of changes from the point of view of grammar and accuracy. Then you get to read the thing again and make more changes.

Ok, I've never been published but I know there is a hell of a lot of back and forth on a novel before it goes off to print. So how come nobody notices?!?

What they need is a continuity girl. And for a generous fee, I'll volunteer.

(Anyone seen any glaring errors in a book they've been reading?)

Just Doing It

I've been a bit quiet this week on the blog, simply because I've been Getting On With It. I've managed to add a couple of thousand words to my novel and I feel like I'm getting back into the swing of things after being fully in children's fiction mode!

I've pledged to finish the first draft by 21st December and through Novel Racers have joined a new blog called The Finishers for general encouragement and mutual arse-kicking.

I'm also using NaNoWriMo as a sort of incentive. I know, I know - it's not really supposed to be about finishing something you already have started and actually care about - but sod it, I'm recording word count and visiting those forums because whatever works is fine by me.

Off to get tappy lappying!

Rejection No.1

So, I'd finally sent those letters + synopsis and first 3 chapters (of my kids' book) off to a bunch of carefully selected agents. The first reply took 9 days to arrive...

I'm a real writer! I got my first rejection!

I've been away for the last few days, so it fell to my other half to open the dread-letter and tell me the news. I felt more sorry for him, to tell the truth.

It was a personal rather than a form letter (good), and the agent said she liked my central character (good) and thought my writing had 'some lovely touches' (v v good!). HOWEVER, she said that due to the genre it would be difficult to place with a publisher as the market is so saturated with that type of book (damn and blast) and it would only appeal to girls (well, yeah).

Maybe she was just being nice, but I tend to think that she probably has a point. Then again, if she'd loved it then this may have all been irrelevant.

Decoded, I think she probably meant: 'Your writing doesn't totally suck, but I don't like it nearly enough to take you on'. Which is fair enough!

So how did I feel? Actually, ok. It was quite novel getting my first rejection letter - although I am sure as eggs is eggs that the novelty will wear off very quickly! I felt disappointed and a bit grumpy for about half an hour, then borrowed a dog and went for a long walk on a beach. This did the trick. After a couple of days to think about it, I do feel a little worried that maybe my book will be difficult to sell because of the reasons the agent outlined, but then again I'm not going to let this eat away at me too much at the moment. The most important thing to think is: HECK, I've written it, now I need to try and sell it and get on and write some more.

To that end, I've written another 1000 words of my adult novel and plotted out a second children's book. Not bad, huh?

And then there's this...

Just in case I'm disappearing too far up my own JLo-sized backside...

This is me writing my children's book (kinda)

What was your first time like?

Firstly, a huge thanks to all who have congratulated me on the SCBWI anthology comp win, it's much appreciated! Still very excited about it all, believe me.

And now, on to the next stage:

Last draft is done. I'm getting ready to send my first query letters to agents for my kids' book. I've done my research, picked a shortlist of agents who I like the look of and might be interested in my work, bought my paper, envelopes and stamps...

...and procrastinated for a few days.

This feels MASSIVE. I am terrified.

I shouldn't be. I'm not as afraid of rejection as most people (I was an actor, lest ye should forget), I've already had a nibble from someone important, plus lots of positive comments from various people who should know their stuff and the competition win. More crucially, I understand that if, WHEN, I get rejection slips this doesn't mean I'm a bad writer. It doesn't spell death for my book. It might mean a lot of things - agents have differing tastes and client lists, or maybe the book isn't good enough YET, or maybe I just caught someone on a bad day, or blah blah blah. Some of the people I submit to will think my work sucks. It doesn't matter. Some will think it's derivative, some won't get my sense of humour, some will like it but think that it won't sell, some will be irritated by my layout - WHATEVER! How many stories do we all know of bestselling authors who got 60 or 70 rejections before the big YES?

I know all of this. Why am I so damn scared? Am I scared they'll...gulp...like it?

I've trawled the web for every decent (and crappy) article and resource on publishing: submitting a manuscript, agents in general, writing a synopsis, approaching editors and the acquisition process, and read Miss Snark et al until I want to throw up all over my damn keyboard! I'm prepared.

All I have to do now is press print and lick the envelope (with the shaking hands and dry mouth that's harder than it sounds), but I am being pathetic. I haven't felt this scared since I did a bungee jump. I'm normally quite a bold sort of gal.

(Get up on a stage in front of hundreds of people? Sure, no problem. Write a damn letter? Aaaaaargh!)

So, humour me. Share your stories. If you have any links to webstuff that might spur me on, please post them. Kind words of encouragement or a bitchslap are both equally encouraged. I'll let you know if I grow the cohones!

Pop!

The title refers to the sound of a champagne cork...

About a year ago I joined the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators, or SCBWI. It's an international organisation and the British group organise a lot of great events such as talks, workshops and evenings with various interesting industry bods. The society is made up of writers and illustrators new and established, published and unpublished - there's a newsgroup and various crit groups and it's a very supportive and inspiring. I'd certainly recommend it to anyone who writes children's fiction.

A few months ago SCBWI held a competition for unpublished writers to have an extract of their work included in an anthology. This would then be sent out to agents and publishers as a kind of showcase of the best new undiscovered talent. I submitted the first 4 chapters of my children's chapter book and pretty much dismissed the idea that I'd get anywhere with it. It all happened at around the same time as the whole Miss Write debacle, so I was feeling a bit down on competitions.

Anyway...a week ago my phone rang and it was one of the organisers...I've been chosen as one of the winners!! My extract is one of 12 to be published in the anthology! We're having a launch party and everything!

I'm so chuffed and full of disbelief. The judging panel consisted of three top agents and editors from 3 major publishers and I feel so encouraged that they felt my extract was half decent! It's a HUGE boost. I've been busy doing a final edit to my book so that I can start the submissions process, so this couldn't have come at a better time for me! It feels like a massive step in the right direction and has given me a chance to get my work in front of people who would not normally consider it.

You can read all about SCBWI and the anthology here.

And yes, in the last week I've had a couple of bottles of fizzy to mark the occasion!

One of those slightly vague and enigmatic posts...

I've been a bit quiet of late, blog-wise.

Been very busy writing, mainly editing my children's book like a woman possessed. Still going well.

Got a couple of things in the pipeline that I'm excited about...will say more as time goes on! All a bit tentative at the mo'!

Cuts - and What is your Ruling Passion?

The editing on my children's book is still going well. My initial cull got rid of a whopping 5,000 words! That's a third of the bloody book!! Seems incredible, but I over-write wantonly. It's a major issue for me, especially in dialogue. Which may or may not be weird, considering that my major writing experience up to this point has been writing plays.

Only another 1500-2000 words to lose and then it will be within publisher's guidelines for the age group. I'm not going to force it, but I think I can lose that reasonably comfortably and not compromise the story.

I had a major breakthrough at the weekend with my novel. I had been wondering why I'd stalled at 70% completed. I had the next section plotted, knew the ending, was in the flow - all should have been a breeze. But it felt clunky.

Well...

I've been reading 'How to Write a Damn Good Novel II' by James N Frey. I'm not hugely into 'How to...' books, but someone had recommended it so I thought I'd give it a whirl. It's an easy read but is definitely aimed at those who've had a bit of experience of writing or done a course. I don't agree 100% with all he says, but it's certainly made me think about my work.

He talks about how the main character has to have a clear 'ruling passion', the driving force/reason/intent that governs his or her actions in the book. For example, character's main ruling passion might be to find his true father, but he may have different ruling passions in different scenes; say, getting drunk or passing his driving test. Some of his ruling passions are mutually compatible, some aren't. If they aren't, this causes conflict which can be dramatically interesting, but the writer should always keep in mind the main ruling passion and not go off on too many tangents!

As a former actor, I should have been more hip to this. In acting these ruling passions are called 'objectives', the governing passion is the 'super-objective'. To be convincing, it's essential to know at any given time - as a writer or an actor - what your character wants!

It all sounds like such obvious stuff, but when I was made to think about it I realised that I'd lost the grip on my character's main ruling passion. It had kind of faded away amongst all the mayhem. So I thought of ways to strengthen it, cut a character, changed a bit of plot and restructured my ending! Not huge changes, but what a difference - now I feel like I know where I'm going again. And why.

Thanks James N Frey, you lil' devil, you.

As an aside to all of this, when I was a drama school and we were learning about all this 'objectives' stuff, I always used to think, 'Well, that's crap. I don't know what I want all of the time, why should my character?' Fair enough. But does that make interesting theatre? Or interesting writing? Moments of indecision are interesting/necessary/dramatic perhaps, but who wants to watch or read something about someone flopping around like a wet cod, with no direction or purpose? Not bloody me.

That's the KajJay take on it - for now, anyway. I'll probably change my mind in a week, but then as Bobby Brown (or indeed, Britney) once said, that's my prerogative...;-)

New Competition!

I haven't read all the t&cs etc, but at first glance the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award looks kinda interesting...(sorry, have tried to link to it but it won't work - they've made it really difficult to find! Go to Amazon.com - US site - and do a search for "Amazon Breakthrough Novel Contest" or similar and you should find it somewhere in the BOOKS section).


I think I'm going to be excluded from it, however. I have a close family member who works for one of the affiliates of one of the sponsors. He found out about it from work and told me, much good that it will do. Boo, and also, hoo. I wonder how strict they're being?!

How many is too many?

A question:

I have over 30 named characters in my book - is this too many?

There is one main character, plus her 3 close friends and 2 love interests. These are the lead characters who keep popping up every chapter or every couple of chapters, either in person they're referenced by someone else.

Then there are probably another half a dozen satellite characters who appear/are mentioned occasionally.

Then there's everyone else. Various work mates, a doorman, a maitre d', an agent, an ex, an old friend. People who had to have real names, perhaps a bit of dialogue, a brief description. Characters who hopefully bring colour to my story, depth to my main characters who interact with them and they also serve as catalysts to certain plot points.

Personally I hate it when a character says, 'Oh, Jane's coming round later, with that letter she told us about...' and as the reader you're thinking - 'Who the hell is Jane?' and flicking back 100 pages or so to find the last reference to this bloody Jane. So I have been careful to avoid this. My bit part characters are exactly that; most of them don't reoccur and if they do I make damn sure the reader knows who they are (but hopefully in a skillful and unclunky way?!).

I've cut a couple of them, but I haven't finished the bloody book yet! There will be more! They're breeding without my permission!

Actually, they are totally under my control. But do you think I need a cull? Is 30+ too many?

I'd be fascinated to know how other people's novels measure up. How many named characters are there in your book?

Rah!

Racing through the editing on my kid's book!

Hope I'm not getting scissor happy!

Ooh, it feels good to have a good edit!

Did 4 chaps, cut 1200 words approx, AND THAT'S ONLY THE FIRST EDIT.

RAH INDEED, AND RAH AGAIN!

Getting Rid of Useless Stuff

Yesterday I was struggling, today it was all change Chez KayJay, thank gawd. I'm all inspired again.

Thanks for the words of wisdom re my first chapter wranglings, I appreciate them all. And all comments generally, unless you're trying to get me to buy something I don't need.

I ploughed on with the novel this afternoon and got about 1000 words done, which is distinctly average (and I fear the words were distinctly average too) but at least I got over my wobble. It wasn't flowing, however, so after a bit I buggered off to editing my children's book, which went really well!

My kid's book was well over 16,000 words - far too long for a chapter book for 6-9 year olds. It was my aim to get it down to 14,000 initially, then 12,000 on the third draft. I made a new document called BIG EDIT and chopped and chopped and chopped. I'm half way through and I've lost about 2000 words (including an entire chapter!) and considering that the second half of the book is much more over-written anyway, I reckon I'll get down to 12,000 words easily. Ideally, it should come in under 10,000, so that will be my goal for draft 3.

Weird to think that the end result will end up at least 30% shorter! Seems like a huge amount to lose. But what an illustration of cutting away the chaff! I had an entire chapter of filler where nothing happened, my dialogue was overly long and indulgent and I kept repeating stuff!

My mantra must be: is it essential for the story? If so, keep. And all the clever twiddly stuff or the random ideas I'm so fond of have to go, unless they are beyond fabulous (and even then, some of them will probably have go).

Funny. I've just realised that I'm doing exactly the same thing in other areas of my life! I'm doing a huge chuck out at home. If it doesn't serve a purpose or is beautiful, bin it! Or preferably recycle. And that's what I'll do with the edits too. They'll go into a file and maybe have a whole new life in a different story.

I utterly love this. I just want you to know that I'm in love with the whole writing process. It is driving me insane at times, but I have such a hunger for it. Sometimes it's frustrating beyond endurance, sometimes scary or even (dare I say it?) dull! Depressing! Faintly ridiculous! But so far, the good bits always come around again.

Ah, well. I'm only a beginner. Give me time and I'll develop some bitter cynicism and festering bile.

I Don't Like Mondays

I didn't do half of the things I wanted to do yesterday. No writing, no Michael Palin...and as for the rest...

I'm finding it difficult to make the mental switch from the day job to my novel at the moment. I have been so in the zone in recent weeks that it has been easy to fit in an hour here, a couple of hours there. But at the moment I can't find it in me to be quite so random and still achieve anything worthwhile.

It doesn't help that I'm at a place in the plot that might naturally lag a little anyway. I guess it's the calm before the storm. I can't wait to get the next couple of chapters out of the way so I can concentrate on the Beginning of the End. I'm having a few doubts about where the focus of the story should be and the overall story arc, the 'through line'. I think the only way to deal with it is to get the thing written anyway (thus sticking to my originally plot line) then reassess it as a whole piece. I wouldn't be surprised if I end up ditching some of it and changing the emphasis considerably. We'll see.

I've also got it into my head that I want to make some major changes to my opening chapter. I love my opening chapter. I must have written it several years ago and of course, it has changed considerably since those first scribbles. Yes, it's gone through some major editing but I've been very happy with it for quite a while. Until now. I guess it's because I've been reading so many opening chapters on various different sites and obsessing about how mine compares in terms of impact, readability, voice - all in regards to getting an agent or publisher interested, of course. The chapter has strengths, I hope: it begins in the heart of the action, has a distinctive voice, humour, an intriguing ending? Then again, as I write this I wonder if it is ALL THAT. Maybe I love my opening chapter for the wrong reasons - ie what it represents to me on a personal level?! Maybe my voice is derivative and the humour is sucky - and who ever thinks they don't have a good sense of humour? Am I telling more than I'm showing? Is my style too...I dunno...kinda cheap? Maybe I use too many damn dashes - and (brackets) and pose too many questions? Or dot dot dot...

Sorry, went off on one there. Having a bit of a deconstructive wallow. I'll rally. Just need to give myself a break then dive into it again for a good stint, uninterrupted.

Any tips?

Ain't that the truth...

'The pages are still blank, but there is a miraculous feeling of the words being there, written in invisible ink and clamouring to become visible.'

Vladimir Nabokov

I love this quotation. Not that I'm this huge Nabokov fan or anything - I think I read the first page of Lolita and gave up - but it does describe how I'm feeling at the moment. (That's the quotation, not the first page of Lolita.)

Actually my word count has gone up in the last week, a little. It's just that right now there's a wee bit too much 'clamouring' and not enough 'becoming visible' going on. Still, it's Sunday, so that means there's time for a long walk, housework, sex, Michael Palin, a big lunch and writing! And not strictly in that order.

(I have just Wiki-ed Nabokov and apparently he was a synesthete! Fascinating. Synethesia is a person thinks Mozart sounds orangey or the number 3 is red or the letter f tastes of sherbet. I've always been a bit inclined this way...to find out if you are, look here. I'll bet a fair few of you are.)

Miss Write...boo who?

The Search for the Next Big Thing in Chick Lit is Over! There ain't gonna be one!

Ah, well. I have the Cosmo/Waterstones/Sphere comp to thank for a hell of a lot. It got me to crack on with my Chick Lit book and introduced me to the blogs of the gals on the right hand side - well worth a read, if you haven't already done so.

The fact that I spent most of August on tenterhooks, waiting for the phone to ring, well...

It seems like the demi-gods who were judging the competition have decided not to appoint a winner. I have to say, on reading about the comp earlier in the year I was surprised by the notion that someone would be given a publishing deal on the strength of 3000 words and a synopsis. Rumours abound as to why the whole thing has been so 'badly managed'. Personally, I'm of the opinion that this was somebody's bright idea that was passed on to someone else with a different agenda and not a lot of time on their hands (sounds good, doesn't it?). Either that or we were all a bit crap.

I'm sure if you've been anywhere near as obsessed with the whole thing as me you've already read the news, if not, check out the blogs on the right for the low down.

I don't feel so bad, really. It's fab for the runners up to get some time with Louise Candlish, pick her brains - that would have been a great experience. Just because I didn't make the cut, I don't think it's any huge reflection on my book. Sphere have a list and the winner's novel would have to work within that list. Cosmo have a demographic, and I'm the wrong side of it! Waterstones have never liked me, either.

Anyway, a heartfelt congrats to those who were runners up, and a huge slice of sympathy for those who weren't. Not that we need it, huh?

(Use the pain, goddammit!)

A Whole New World of Hurt

Beginnings are always difficult. Beginning a new book, beginning a chapter, beginning a new writing session, sitting gazing at the monitor and willing it to start filling up with words.

And so it is with some trepidation that I begin this blog. Not my first blog - I popped that particular cherry a few years ago - but my first writing blog. Writing blog. So now my blogging has to have some vestige of skill to it...

Anyway, the hard facts. I'm a thirtysomething female, tapping away at the keyboard (as my mother calls it, doing 'Tappy Lappy', hence the title) and dreaming of being published. I live in London, run my own business, largely from home, and write whenever the phone stops ringing.

I've written several children's plays that have been performed by professional companies, but as yet I haven't been published. Plays are huge fun - and in a previous incarnation I was an actor - but writing children's books and women's/comedy fiction is where my real desires lie.

Currently I'm working on two books: firstly, I'm editing a chapter book for 6-9 year olds, which is far too bloody long for its own good; secondly there's my Chick Lit book, which is two thirds of the the way through its first draft.

Being a former actor, I am well acquainted with rejection, creative blockage, general gnashing of teeth and dreaming of big dreams. But writing is lonelier. The social life isn't as nearly as good. So, I'm creating this blog to try and reach out to my fellow scribes in the hope that we can all help each other with dealing with this wierd pursuit.

(If all the above sounds a tad pompous, don't fret. I get more user-friendly the more you get to know me. And hopefully the writing will improve. So stick around?)

Right. That's the end of the beginning. Not as concise and enthralling as I'd like, but no doubt I'll go back and edit it when I'm stuck on the middle bit or the tricky ending.